25 Silver Years...

(originally posted on November 07, 2007)

I call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when I want to stop the world to take a look of my own life. A time in my life when I started to count my accomplishments, number of trials and reckon my triumph.

It is when we, people of my age, stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about ourselves that we didn't know and may not like. We start feeling insecure and wonder where we will be in a year or two, but then get scared because we barely know where we are now.

We start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that we thought we were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people we have ever met, and the people we have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What we don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold or insincere, but that they are as confused as we are.

We look at our job... and it is not even close to what we thought we would be doing, or maybe we are looking for a job and realizing that we are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares us.

Our opinions have gotten stronger. We see what others are doing and find ourselves judging more than usual because suddenly we realize that we have certain boundaries in our life and are constantly adding things to our list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, we are insecure and then the next, secure. We laugh and cry with the greatest force of our lives. We feel alone and scared and confused.

Suddenly, change is our enemy and we try and cling on to the past, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where we are or move forward.

We get our heart broken and wonder how someone we loved could do such damage to us. Or we lie in bed and wonder why we can't meet anyone decent enough that we want to get to know better. Or maybe we love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why we are doing this because we know that we aren't a bad person.

We go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with our friends about the same topics because we cannot seem to make a decision. We worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for ourselves... and while winning the race would be great, right now we'd just like to be a contender!

We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Life is beautiful. It is a gift to be enjoyed. Live each day as if it’s your last. Forget the past and try to move on, live in the present and stop worrying for the future. In the end, it is not always we get what we want or what we need, but it’s just right to get what we deserved!