wEn LoVe diEs...

SOMETIMES, love dies. And there is no easy explanation for it.

Some of us see it coming. Some of us dont. But
most of us try not to see it at all. Because it is
easier to pretend that all is well rather than admit that
your dreams have been shattered and you are left only
with the broken pieces of your heart.

It hurts to imagine the person we love with
someone else. It hurts to no longer be the object of his
affections. It hurts to no longer be the center of his
universe. It hurts to no longer be wanted. It hurts to
be discarded, replaced and dumped
unceremoniously like an old rag that has outlived
its usefulness.

It hurts to no longer be loved.

But it happens everyday to the best among us to
the beautiful, the kind, the talented, the smart, the
successful, the multi-awarded. It happens to the
perfect wife, sister, friend and mother. It happens
to the civic leader, the CEO, the cover girl.

Whether or not its something we did or didnt do,
sometimes, love just dies. And overthinking would serve no purpose.

To be loved is a blessing. But to no longer be loved
is not necessarily a tragedy.

Weve been raised since childhood to believe that
love must last forever. And perhaps it must. But
isnt it possible to simply be happy for the love you have
no matter if it doesnt last forever? Isnt it possible
to simply savor the moment and become richer by it
without wanting to possess it forever? Isnt it
possible to love and let go and love again?

Isnt it possible to love forever but to love different
people over time?

Its all right to no longer be loved. Its all right to
stop loving. Its all right to mourn for loves losses but to
condemn yourself to a life of misery because your
love did not last forever is foolhardy. If love must
die, let it go peacefully into the night.

But dont keep score. Love is not a contest. It is
not a competition to see who emerges the prettiest, the
craftiest or toughest. Love is what it is a gift. It
cannot be forced on anyone. Neither can it be
forced out of anyone. So let it be.

When love dies, hold on to the memories. But let
go of the one you love... :-)

Don't stare at the close door that long, move 0n and try to stay happy!

(originally posted on Aug 2005)